The Ex Files

So, I've been keeping something kind of scandalous to myself for a while. I wasn't ready to talk about it, or maybe I just didn't want to admit it, or maybe I didn't want my friends and family to find out about it... Regardless, I'm ready now to share the mess that has become my life.

I've been talking to the Ex for about a month. I saw that he had created a Facebook profile and listed himself as single. I heard that he and his fiance had broken up but was really surprised to see it and know that it was true. In case you didn't know, something isn't "real" until it's on Facebook.

I controlled myself for about a week, then friended him. I did it because I knew it would start some kind of drama. And I was bored. And I wanted to see if he still liked me. And I have zero self control. All of those things. He accepted my friendship and started talking to me...about how much he missed me...he still had feelings for me...he couldn't believe that I was talking to him...how sorry he was for how he treated me before...and of course he told me his little sob story about his ex-fiance and how she had "cheated" on him and broke his little heart.

We started talking every day. We saw each other a few times. And after spending months getting over him, and being totally secure and happy by myself, I was right back where I started--absolutely into him despite knowing better. After my sister told my parents that I snuck out of the house to see him (still hilarious btw) they were furious.

Each night (because she's crazy), my mom texts me "night love". She amended her nightly text to say, "night love .. don't talk to your ex"... But no, I didn't listen because I didn't care..I was all, "Whatever mom! You're so negative. People can change! He's changed! I'm 23. Stop interfering in my life."

Obviously, I must have been keeping some teenage angst on reserve for a situation like this.

Then things started to unravel...He kept reminding me that we were not dating. We were friends hanging out seeing where things would go. Now, I'm not sure, but usually when someone feels the need to let you know you're not dating, that's not a good sign. It's not like I was planning our lives together. I'm pretty sure I had asked him if he had a good day at work. He kept making tentative plans to come over and hang out then had excuses why he couldn't come over. And I started picking fights...

Friday, I had the most unbelievable day of my teaching life. Horrific. I texted him and said that I wished he could come over. He said he would love to but he had plans. Then, via some Facebook stalking, I see that he's going out for dinner and a movie and to the bar...and he's not answering my texts. (And I'll have you know I sent 2 not 100. Thank you. I have some self control.)

Hmmm... Long story short he was on a date. And tried to tell me that it was just dinner and a movie and drinking all night with a friend who was a girl. Now, I'm not sure in what world he's living, but that is a date. In fact, that's better than most of the crappy dates that I've been on! Seriously...

And then my crazy came out..

After a night out with the girls, I unfriended him on Facebook. Then I friended his ex-fiance. And I told him about it. Of course, he was all, "You're crazy and I didn't do anything and you're being really hurtful for no reason." And I did not care. Yes. I realize that we're not dating, but do not think you are going to walk all over me and tell me that a date is not a date and not expect my crazy to come out.

I don't even care that he went on a date. Whatever. Go on dates. Do whatever you want, but I'm not an idiot and I'm not going to be treated like one.

Also, the "friend" he went on his date with has a tongue ring. I don't know why that makes it seem worse to me, but it does.

The moral of this story is that you shouldn't let your ex come over to "talk" at 3 in the morning, I'm a Facebook stalker, and I ate McDonald's french fries for breakfast today.

The End.