Let's get it on..

I think my BC pill is starting to cause some mood swings. I was weepy, pissy, tired, excited, depressed, lonely, and antisocial today.

So it was basically like a normal day, but I was still trying really hard to use it as an excuse to not have to go to pilates.

The LAST thing I wanted to do was sweat my ass off and be owned by middle aged soccer moms with six packs. I was looking forward to a night of watching Clean House in my blanket cocoon, but then I remembered that I want to be hott and get fit. It was a huge dilemma...

So what did I do? I bribed myself with food, like the inner fat ass that I am.

Dear Turkey Bacon,

You were what I used to bribed myself to go to pilates. All class, I was thinking dirty thoughts about you. I couldn't wait to get home, get you into the pan, and listen to that sweet sizzle. I was really looking forward to getting it on with you.

After class, I went to the grocery store and picked you up. I even got the expensive brand, because I'm a classy broad. I've only ever had you at restaurants before and was so excited for you and I to reunite in my kitchen.

And then I put you in the pan. No sizzle. No delicious bacon grease. No heavenly aroma. Nothing. You were like all of my ex-boyfriends--a lot of anticipation with no follow through.

You let me down Turkey Bacon. We will not be getting down again. I'm over you.

Still pissed,

Crazy Charm

P.S. Real bacon was so much better than you.

After I lose it, this will probably be the blog post they go back to and say, "This is when it all started to go wrong."